Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
