So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
