Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I have fence marks all over my body
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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