Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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