The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
