The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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