But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
