i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
