OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I'm jealous of your bromance
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
