I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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