Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
