is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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