My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
