Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
