It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
