She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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