Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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