What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
