you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
