Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
