I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
