What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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