Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize