Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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