I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
