Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
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