I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Randomize
