she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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