i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
where am i from again
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
