I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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