you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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