youre lurking in front of me
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
