i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
