he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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