Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
