we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
