the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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