What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
