why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
