he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
