omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
