After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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