At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He felt like a one man threesome
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
