coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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