Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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