Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I need to calm my uterus...
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
