apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize