Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Randomize
