D3 body, D1 cock
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
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