problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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